Well the holidays are over already and I'm home alone with my little Herberts once again. Only this time things feel slightly different...
Over the half term I have come to realise that I am the catalyst of the house. My husband has very little motivation which means I have to step up if I want anything done around here. That could be either inserting a rocket into the correct orifice or just doing it myself. I suppose it has always been like this but I didn't notice. Since having two babies in rapid succession, the work involved seems to have more than doubled so it is a real struggle to get things done.
I have always felt that the housey stuff has been my "job" as I'm here all the time. This may be an old fashioned view but if I worked it would be a whole 'nother kettle of kippers! There is too much to do now for one person to find it manageable without losing all their grey matter and getting clogged up with dust and fluff! As it has gradually increased I have been busting a gut to do it all and run myself into the ground.
My husband has also been quite down lately. He has struggled to enjoy things, not been able to sleep well or concentrate. Over the last week we have tried to organise his days days at work more so he doesn't get so stressed about it. In order to help I have taken the kids out for the day or for walks, got up at 5.30am every day so he can catch up on his sleep and written up ideas that may help him, as well as doing all the daily stuff. After a whole week, that's 9 days off work he's hardly done anything. He bought a filing cabinet I found and put it together, emptied his van, cleaned it and put everything back in.. Brilliant. What a waste of a week. I know he feels he has achieved something and feels a bit better about it so I haven't said anything to him. I am a bit annoyed really as we could have done so much more if he had bothered.
I have always tried to get up with the boys so he can sleep, as he drives all day and needs to be alert. Once they are in bed at 7pm I'm shattered and manage to keep my eyes open until about 9pm before I'm dozing off. That is when the Big One goes to bed so my husband then wants us to spend time together. I do my best but I'm running myself into the ground staying up. I have decided I am going to go to bed at 10.30pm as that is a bit of time for us and a chance for me to get 7 hours sleep tops before the boys wake up.
There are so many things that need doing around the house I am getting frustrated that they aren't getting done. I think I am just going to get on with things as it will be better in the long run. He won't feel like I'm pressuring him to do more and I will feel like things are getting done. Let's hope it works eh?!
Hope you're having a tip top monday in spite of the rubbish weather!
It sounds like you're a very busy mummy! Don't run yourself into the ground hun, I do the same thing and I end up so worn out that I can't do anything at all. Stay on top of the big stuff but don't sweat the little things.
ReplyDeleteI feel exactly the same with the housework stuff. Not in a 'that's our role' kind of way but more in a 'that's my job' sort of thing..like you described. Aaron works all week, that's his job, and I'm a full-time Mummy, so all the house and kids stuff is my job. It's exhausting though lol.